For I Have Learned

"For I have learned how to be content (satisfied) to the point
where I am not disturbed or disquieted) in whatever state I am.
I know how to be abased and live humbly in straitened 
circumstances, and I know also how to enjoy plenty and live 
in abundance. 
I have learned in any and all circumstances the secret of facing
every situation, whether well-fed or going hungry, having a s
ufficiency and enough to spare or going without and being i
n want.-------
I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me for 
anything......."
Philippians4:11-13 (Ampl Bible)

Well, what a Scripture!!.  My dear beloveds the Lord has to work 
on me so much even while I am nearly 53,  I am so far from being
perfect.  Everytime I think.  "Wow Susan you are getting the hang
of it being a real "holy" child of God."  Something happens only for 
me to realize again.  God must help me for I am so imperfect. I fail 
him so much.

But when I was younger, much younger the Lord had a "Mountain" 
named Susan to work on.  Oh I was so naughty.  If things didn't go 
myyyyyyyy way, I so quickly got cross with the Lord and everybody
around me.  I was an ugly person when I was young. Oh the Lord had
so much work to do on Susan. --------Life was touch, and I couldn't 
understand the Lord so often.  Asking Him why this, why that, why, 
why, why  all the time.  Sometimes I was a good girl, for when we 
went to bought groceries with our two small kids, I accepted the 
fact that we couldn't buy so many things.  When Amelia wanted 
something or Wessel, I didn't get mad that we couldn't buy it.  

When my dearly beloved Peet. (I still remember one certain day)  
We walked passed some grapes and he said " Oh how I wish we 
could buy only one box"  My heart cried, but I wasn't in rebellion in 
my heart.  As I say sometimes I was a good girl of our Heavenly F
ather, but so often a naughty one too. for I couldn't understand why 
our car broke down so often as we didn't have the money to fix it 
always. 
Simple things like the broken lawnmower got me upset and I just 
had a spirit of discontentment.

One day things didn't go my way again.  I was in rebellion again 
(poor Peet, he was always so content) and I went to the room to talk 
to the Lord about this matter.  I knelt at the bedside, opened my Bible 
and here came this Scripture and jumped right out of the Bible into 
my heart.  The Lord started to explain some things to me in my spirit.

You see Paul was just like me, B U T  he -----has----l e a r n e d  to 
be content. Suddenly I was exited. I said: "Lord so he was discontent 
with his circumstances too sometimes,  just like me!!!!!!!???????.  In my 
spirit I heard His still small voice "Yes and he had to l e a r n to 
become content.----- Peet has learned at Bible College that Paul was
a very stubborn person.  Full of nonsense and easy to retaliate.  He 
had a very strong personality and if it wasn't for his stubbornness to 
see Caesar, he would have been a free man very early in his life.----
but of course it was all in God's plan otherwise we wouldn't have had a 
Bible because there wouldn't have been so many letters of Paul to teach 
us.--------But the anointing of the Lord rested upon that man of God 
and just like me he must have made a decision one day ----- to 
become content and willing to learn --------  
That day changed my life when I read the word  learned, learned, 
learned over and over. I realized that it doesn't come with a magic 
wand, but with hard practice.  Counting to 10 or perhaps 100..........lol.  
Yes, perhaps to first go and pray before saying a word etc.  

As the years went by Peet one day said something and I give the 
Lord all the glory for it.  He said  "My engel (angel) ---that is what he 
calls me, your eyes have softened, he told me how much I have changed 
and I was in wonder.  Again to God be all the glory an I plead the 
Blood of Jesus over this testimony, for satan always tries to steal a 
testimony 

I also have learned.  But just before you start to think Susan is 
wonderful,  I must remind you that just last night I failed the test again. 
Our children and grandchildren are so sick for over a week now and I 
wasn't mad at my Lord but very near to it.  Just enough for Him to see
right through me.  So see I am not so wonderful as you think.  I have 
still got sooooooo much learning to do.

But now comes the question.   "How on earth am I going to be able to 
learn and be a better child of God?  The answer is in verse 13"I have 
strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me {I am ready for 
anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength
into me; I am self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency}".  Oh here is the  
solution.  I will have to spend much more time in His presence so 
that He can infuse me with inner strength to be able to learn to be 
content.  Oh what a mighty verse!!.
May the Lord help Me and you.

So in closing I want to urge you and myself that we will say 
to the Lord;
 
 "Lord, I am willing to learn.  Paul Your servant had to,
so who am I not be willing to be teachable and willing to learn
that Your ways is best and that You always mean well with me,
even in learning me how to be content in all circumstances.
Help me Lord and infuse inner strength in my spirit as I wait upon 
You on my knees.
Lord I pray  help each reader of this writing that as of this day we 
will be submissive and be willing to learn.  
Thank you Heavenly Father in Jesus Christ's Name
Amen.
 

By Susan.
Copyright (c) 2002.Susan Treptow